Ahead of Father’s Day on June 16, Pastor Jesse Bradley of Grace Community Church in Auburn, Washington, shared three damaging lies he believes American dads are being told in today’s culture, and why fathers need to reject these untruths in order to raise their children well. Bradley emphasized that many dads are hardworking, fun, kind, and intelligent, but deceptive lies about fatherhood can be harmful. He urged dads to replace these lies with truth and have faith in God to break free from mental traps that can hinder their parenting.
Lie No. 1 focuses on the false message that ‘You can’t be a good dad’. Bradley explained that this defeatist message can be debilitating for fathers, especially those who may have had negative experiences with their own fathers. He encouraged dads to remember that their past experiences do not define them and to receive God’s love, healing, and faithfulness as a Father to the fatherless. Bradley emphasized that with faith, men can overcome their past and become the dads they never had, allowing their negative experiences to motivate positive change.
Lie No. 2 revolves around the idea that ‘It’s fine to be an independent dad’. Bradley warned against the temptation for men to go solo in their parenting, pointing out that relationships, although messy at times, are worth investing in. He stressed the importance of not isolating oneself and instead embracing the support of God and others. Bradley noted that retreating to an ‘independence’ mindset can lead to shallow relationships and a distance from family and loved ones, urging dads to prioritize their relationships and connections.
Lie No. 3 challenges the belief that ‘Being a father is not that important’. Bradley emphasized that fatherhood is a unique role that cannot be replaced by anyone else, and should be cherished and prioritized. He encouraged dads to connect with their children daily, listen to their fears, create meaningful experiences, offer wise advice, and be present in their lives. Bradley highlighted the multi-faceted nature of being a father, encompassing relational, intellectual, emotional, physical, and spiritual responsibilities, urging dads to give their best and avoid bringing ‘leftovers’ from work.
Bradley reminded fathers that being grateful and intentional in their role as a dad leads to profound joys of fatherhood. He advised dads to enjoy their kids, connect with them on a daily basis, share activities, memories, wisdom, and laughter with them, and be actively engaged in their lives. By embracing their role as fathers, connecting with their families, and seeking support from God and others, dads can overcome damaging lies about fatherhood and raise their children in a loving, supportive environment that fosters growth, happiness, and positive relationships.
