Many high-school graduates have missed traditional graduation ceremonies due to the pandemic, and now some college graduates are facing the same disappointment amid ongoing political protests. Several universities, including Columbia University and the University of Southern California, have cancelled their traditional commencements for 2024. Anti-Israel protesters disrupted ceremonies at the University of Michigan. As a result, graduates and their families may experience “milestone FOMO,” feeling disappointed, angry, depressed, and anxious about their futures.
Milestone FOMO refers to the fear of missing significant life events that others are experiencing. This can lead to a reduced sense of accomplishment for graduates who are unable to celebrate their hard work with a traditional ceremony. Missing out on graduation can cause feelings of grief, loss, sadness, disappointment, and a sense of incompleteness as students transition into adulthood. The absence of closure and a tangible marker for this important transition can make it harder to process the end of this life chapter and move forward.
Experts recommend several ways to counter milestone FOMO and process the emotions associated with missing graduation. It is important for graduates to acknowledge and accept their feelings of sadness, anger, disappointment, and frustration. Challenging and reframing any unhelpful thinking can also be beneficial, as well as creating a personal graduation ceremony with family and friends to celebrate the achievement. Graduates should focus on what has been accomplished and gained, rather than what has been lost, and take action toward setting short- and long-term goals for the future.
Family members can also play a role in helping graduates cope with the disappointment of missing their graduation ceremony. Encouraging graduates to express their feelings, accepting the situation, and helping them plan their next steps can provide support. Parents and loved ones can validate graduates’ feelings, find alternative ways to celebrate their accomplishments, and offer encouragement. If graduates are struggling to move past the disappointment and it begins to affect their daily functioning and mood, seeking professional help from a licensed clinician may be advisable.
