The news that “Golden Bachelor” couple Gerry Turner and Theresa Nist have decided to divorce just three months after their televised wedding was announced during a joint interview on “Good Morning America.” This came as a disappointment to many in Bachelor Nation who were rooting for the success of a more mature couple. Nicole Sodoma, a divorce attorney, had initially been hopeful for their chances, considering the unique challenges that come with entering a new relationship at an older age, particularly second or third marriages. Factors like children, grandchildren, community roots, and other commitments can all play a role in the success of the relationship.
Sodoma stressed the importance of having the “right conversations” in these more complex relationships, including discussions about finances, how children will relate to each other, and potential living arrangements. She pointed out that second and third marriages, as well as ‘gray divorces,’ often involve conversations that don’t typically come up in first marriages. She expressed skepticism that Turner and Nist had sufficient time between their wedding and divorce announcement to have these necessary discussions. Sodoma emphasized the importance of understanding the difference between connection and communication in older-aged relationships, as well as recognizing that compromises may need to be made.
In advising golden daters, Sodoma recommended having real conversations about expectations, including those related to health, and understanding love languages. She cautioned against setting oneself up for failure when blending families, particularly when it comes to beneficiaries of life insurance policies and estates. She also highlighted the importance of getting on the same page with your partner about important issues like separation, divorce, or death. More importantly, she stressed that older-aged relationships come with baggage that may not fit easily into the overhead bin, and that taking the time to properly address these issues is crucial.
Overall, Sodoma emphasized that entering into a new relationship at an older age requires careful consideration of various factors that may not have been present in a person’s first marriage. Couples should have open and honest conversations about important issues and be prepared to compromise where necessary. Understanding each other’s expectations, love languages, and potential challenges that may arise, particularly when blending families, can help avoid unnecessary conflict. By taking the time to have these important conversations, couples can increase their chances of success in a second or third marriage or a ‘gray divorce.’
