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When Cheryl Burke was 9 years old, she testified in court against a caretaker who sexually abused her and her stepsister.
The former Dancing With the Stars pro recalled the traumatic experience on the Monday, January 20 episode of the Old-ish podcast.
“Both of us were getting sexually molested by the same person, the caretaker that was taking care of us,” Burke, 40, said. “And then it was my sister’s best friend that ran home and told her mother. It was the reason why he was sentenced — he was supposed to be life in prison, but he got out.”
During his trial, “I almost was already gaslighting myself,” she continued. “I’ll never forget it when I was actually testifying with this man sitting in front of me. They wouldn’t even let my mom come with me, which was so crazy. I was 9. And I was thinking to myself, ‘Am I making this s— up?’ I was literally saying saying this to myself.”
Burke added: “I already felt, at 9 years old, like, I was the pedophile. That’s how they made me feel.”
She explained during her Old-ish appearance that she’s a “professional disassociator” as a result of her past trauma, which she is trying to make peace with.
“There’s no, ‘OK, I’m done with that part of my life,’” Burke said. “But I have done so much work to where I couldn’t handle the anger I had for this one person that I felt like I was slowly dying, so there had to be some sort of peacemaking happening. Not the forgiveness of the act by any means, but I had to create some sort of, like, ‘OK, this man was sick.’”
However, she noted, “I’m not forgiving. I don’t want people to take this the wrong way, like I’m forgiving him for molesting.”
Burke has previously opened up about the abuse she endured as a child, first in 2015 and later while discussing how the ordeal had impacted her relationships with men as an adult.
She thinks that, going forward, it will become more difficult for other victims to speak out against their abusers.
“It’s society today, man,” Burke told Old-ish, adding, “Why would anyone ever wanna come out and say their truth when the person who’s the victim is feeling like they’re doing something wrong? And it’s so easy to gaslight somebody and this whole statute of limitations. It’s all bulls— because it takes decades, if not lifetimes, to finally realize or have some sort of awareness that, ‘Yeah, maybe I did get raped.’”
She added: “There was no quick fixes to any of this. There’s none. And I don’t wanna even have that come across by any means. There’s no medication. There’s no shrooms. Believe me, I’ve tried it all. And it just comes back tenfold unless you do the work, and boy it doesn’t hurt. It’s painful. This work is painful.”
If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, contact the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673).