The author reflects on the impact of Ted Kaczynski, the Unabomber, on his life as he grew up in Montana, near the Unabomber’s cabin. The sudden media attention surrounding the Unabomber’s capture made the author realize how others viewed Montana as a wilderness of possibility, a refuge for those seeking an escape. However, the author’s life in Montana was more suburban than romantic, far from the wilderness mythos associated with the state.
The Unabomber’s story followed a familiar blueprint of leaving behind a successful life to test himself in nature and becoming a symbol of the monster in the woods, terrorizing society. This made the author question his own purpose and consider leaving Montana for a different path. The author reflects on the American dream and the constant urge to reinvent oneself, feeling like a stranger in a place that is supposed to be home.
The media’s attempt to romanticize the Unabomber and portray him as a philosophical figure who found purpose in the wilderness was criticized by the author, who saw through his violent acts as a cowardly attempt to justify his distorted ambitions. Despite his death, the Unabomber’s mythology continues to grow, with young people creating their own stories and spreading messages from his manifesto online, seeking heroes from the worst among us.
The author delves into his own personal journey of rebellion, driven by a search for purpose and home while rejecting the American dream. After years of wandering, the author returns to Missoula, finding solace in the familiar landscapes despite the changes that have taken place over the years. Each day, the author strives to see Montana for what it truly is – complex, beautiful, and steeped in history. The author hopes to eventually know Montana as only home and find a form of deeper purpose through community and stewardship.
